“Hit lists” sap energy for no reason
After you didn’t get that promotion, funding, audition, spot, etc. it feels rewarding to put people on a hit list.
These aren’t people you kill. They are people you are going to “hit” with your “success.”
“They are going to remember me because I remember today, and when I “get” it (whatever it is) I’ll make sure they know.” *queue revenge music*
It isn’t worth remembering the people who “slighted” you for several reasons.
Here are a few:
- Don’t contribute to malice what you could contribute to incompetence.
- People (generally) aren’t out to get you.
- You don’t know what they went through that day.
That moment’s importance is relative to you. That other person is just doing a job. You weren’t their cup of tea today. That’s fine.
There is a limit to time and energy.
It takes energy to support, store and retrieve “memories” for the hit list.
You then have to spend time crossing people off the list, doing a “hit” when you get some success.
“I got the part, now I can’t wait to post it on Facebook. They are going to see it.”
That is draining and only causes more conflict. Every time you don’t get enough, you add to the hit list.
“Hit lists” never stop growing.
Would you rather keep up hit lists or get better?